


Too Much Coffee, Not Enough Pancakes

by Nocticola



Series: Julian Blackthorn, canon demi [1]
Category: Haven (TV), The Dark Artifices Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Canon demisexual character, Crossover, Demisexual Julian Blackthorn, Demisexual Nathan Wuornos, Demisexuality, F/M, Kinda, Parabatai Bond, Post-Troubles (Haven), Pre-Book 1: Lady Midnight, they don't actually really meet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-10
Updated: 2018-09-10
Packaged: 2019-06-27 22:23:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,235
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15694539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nocticola/pseuds/Nocticola
Summary: Nathan Wuornos and Paige take James on a vacation to Los Angeles. (Chapter 1)Julian and Emma are taking a break and having pancakes at Canter’s Delicatessen (Chapter 2)Semi-Crossover. Not quite a meeting. Post-Haven, pre-Lady Midnight (right before England trip): May 2012





	1. Nathan Wuornos

**Author's Note:**

> Notes: Look at my demi pancake boys! Also both of these stories are set in 2012, so it fits.  
> A note for TDA readers unfamiliar with Haven: Nathan Wuornos is 36 year old headcanon/fanon demi from Syfy’s Haven who also loves pancakes. He knows about difficult love stories, because the love of his life, has been many people, the main one he loved was Audrey Parker, but he has had complicated feelings for other versions of her, the latest being Paige after they managed to stop Haven’s Troubles and the world from ending. It’s complicated. They also have a son, James. Paige remembers a lot of her past and Audrey.  
> And for Haven readers, Julian 17 year old is a canon demi who cooks pancakes every Friday for his kids/siblings, who is in love with his parabatai Emma, but they can’t actually be together because parabatais being in love makes them too powerful and they go crazy and kill everyone. Also, Emma is in an on/off relationship with a Cameron.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nathan, Paige and James are on holiday in Los Angeles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fic Art: https://demisexualnathanvuornos.tumblr.com/post/177954834768/too-much-coffee-not-enough-pancakes-chapter-1

Nathan holds James in his arms as he follows Paige inside the Canter’s Delicatessen. They’ve decided to go on their first family trip, and the sunny California on the other side of the country seems like a good idea. The Troubles have been over for about six months now, and Haven’s rebuilding can survive without Nathan for a few days. James was surprisingly calm during his first flight, which was a relief because Nathan’s Bronco couldn’t have handled a cross country trip (Paige joked during the planning stage that the Bronco would barely make it out of Maine, which Nathan was offended by, but he had to admit she was probably right). Nathan drives their rental car, because even though he’s not quite comfortable with cars that aren’t his Bronco, he is still a better driver than any version of Paige. 

When Nathan saw a pancake place, he just had to stop. Their mutual love of pancakes has always been an important aspect of their relationship, and Nathan is curious to see what Los Angeles has to offer on that front. James is just starting to eat solids but it's already clear that he takes after his Dad in his love for pancakes. They find a table quickly, and James gets his own chair and then they start checking out the menu. James gets his own tiny pancakes, while both Paige and Nathan get chocolate chip pancakes and coffee. 

As they wait for their food and drink their coffees, Nathan concentrates on keeping James occupied by playing with him. Paige plays with her hair and smiles as she looks at her boys. 

“Do you think I should dye my hair blonde?” she asks out of nowhere, looking thoughtfully at a strand of her hair. 

Nathan looks up at her, his face is almost unreadable. Paige’s hair is thick and slightly wavy and dark brown. She likes wearing hats and wears her hair in a ponytail or flowing freely. The styles are similar to Audrey’s, but the color and texture differ. She doesn’t match Lucy either, her hair was a lighter brown, thinner, straighter. Sarah had a curly red head. Lexie and Mara were dirty blondes, yet their hairs were still different from each other. All of them were beautiful, in their own ways. Even though he has essentially only loved one woman in his life, his love life is really complicated. 

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Nathan finally says. 

Paige raises an eyebrow, “Because of Audrey?” 

“Kinda. And I don’t think blonde is really your style.” 

“I have a ‘style’, do I?” Paige asks, sounding amused. 

“Yeah,” Nathan says, and then smirks like he had a brilliant idea, “You should dye your hair purple. I bet you haven’t done that before.” 

Paige laughs, "Purple? Are you serious?" 

"Yeah, I bet your students would love it if you eventually came back from summer break with purple hair," Nathan attempts to sound serious, but in reality it's his 'I'm joking' voice, except you need to know him really well to pick up on that. 

Paige looks at him, and she has that look that always means that she has figured him out. He loves that look. He likes being an open book to her. 

“Do you mean a ‘demi’ purple?” 

Nathan takes hold of the black ring on a chain around his neck. "Maybe." Then he turns to speak to James, "James would love it, too, wouldn't you, James? You'd love it if your Mom had purple hair. It is one of his favorite colors."

"He's not quite old enough to make those choices, Nathan. Tell Daddy he's being silly, James." James seems to agree with his mother and pats Nathan's cheek with his tiny hand and giggles. Nathan laughs in return and gives James a kiss.

He turns to Paige again, "I really think you would look good with any hair color. I mean, I know *you* look good, always. But I don't know, it would be weird for you to be blonde. But I’ll always love it, no matter what color your hair is. And not just because that's how I work. Or maybe that is why,” Nathan ends his slight ramble with a confused shrug. 

"I know. It's kinda handy that way. And you're probably right about the blondness," Paige smiles and pulls Nathan into a kiss right before their pancakes arrive. 

“You’re always the one for me.” Nathan whispers. 

As the whole family digs into their pancakes, Nathan happens to look up and sees a teenage boy, with messy brown hair, sitting at a nearby booth with a blonde girl of similar age, and he seems to be staring at Nathan. Nathan thinks he might have noticed them earlier from the corner of his eye. The boy looks down and away from him when he notices that Nathan caught him. It’s a bit weird, but Nathan lets it go and concentrates on his pancakes. 

"So. How do they rank?" Paige asks, humoring Nathan's thought of being a pancake connoisseur. 

Nathan takes another bite and chews it with concentration " We have better in Haven, but these are still good." 

"Good enough for seconds?" 

"Definitely." 

Eventually, Nathan notices the boy and girl from the booth leave but he doesn't pay them much mind. Sometimes people just stare at people. Nathan is her to enjoy his vacation with his family. They’ve all earned this.


	2. Julian Blackthorn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julian struggles with his feelings for Emma and what exactly it means about him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fic Art: https://demisexualnathanvuornos.tumblr.com/post/177954840163/too-much-coffee-not-enough-pancakes-chapter-2

“Julian, relax. The kids are fine, Diana and Malcolm are both at the Institute, we can take a pancake break,” Emma tells him as they find their booth at the Canter. 

Julian is both happy and unhappy about being here with Emma. He’s happy to take a break from being a parent, pretend for a few hours like he is a normal 17 year old boy, and because he gets to spend some time with Emma, just the two of them. But he’s also unhappy, because he *is* a parent, and his siblings need him at the Institute. And Emma… spending time with Emma has become a double edged sword for him. 

“I know. I do know how to relax, you know,” Julian grumbles, but Emma just laughs, her golden hair open and flowing freely around her face. As so often these days, Julian is thinking of which colors he should use to capture her hair color today. 

Julian's feelings for Emma have been getting out of control for a while now. Of course, the _parabatai_ bond is by its nature very strong, but that’s not what Julian feels for Emma. He knows it’s wrong, against the law even, and that Emma doesn’t feel the same way about him, dating Cameron Ashdown on and off (which is good, because of the aforementioned law thing), but it makes things har-, difficult, for Julian. 

His desire for Emma is becoming ridiculous, uncontrollable. He needs to get a grip (of Emma's luscious hair, bury his hands in it as he kisses her breathless) of himself. Over the years, Julian has learned to control every aspect of himself. When you need to raise your four siblings, take care of a mentally broken uncle and run a powerful Institute, he doesn’t have much other choice but to be constantly in control over everything. He should be able to control his feelings for Emma. He shouldn't even be thinking about this, about Emma like this. _Why_ does he have to think about Emma like this? And why _only_ about Emma? 

Why does no one else do anything for him? Sure, he couldn’t stop staring at Isabelle Lightwood at his sister Helen’s wedding, so she probably was his first crush, but that was nothing compared to how he feels about Emma, how he has felt about Emma since six months after their _parabatai_ ceremony, when suddenly he understood the Greek and the French and how they describe being in love. As arrows or as bolts of lightning. 

But he shouldn't. Absolutely not. Emma is his _parabatai_ , and it's illegal to fall for your _parabatai_. Still, he wonders. Why, during all these years, has he not yet managed to fall for someone else, some safe, someone who he's allowed to love? It's weird, going from feeling nothing at all, and then when he did fall, it was like no one else could be for him. Neither seem quite right. He's heard people talk, about crushes and relationships and sex, but he really can't seem to be doing this right. Why does he have to be all or nothing? Emma has had more than one crush, more than one relationship. Julian's heard all about them. It can't be a _parabatai_ thing. Why is he incapable of moving on from Emma?

While he's been caught up in his thoughts, he and Emma have ordered their pancakes (Julian doesn't always order them, but sometimes it's fun to eat ones he didn't have to make himself) and Emma is talking about how her latest demon fight went. The mundanes can hear them, so Emma uses code words. Hopefully people aren't really paying any attention to her story because talking about catching and killing wild animals with her sword sounds only slightly less weird than what really happened. But Julian doesn't mind the slight weird danger, he loves hearing Emma talk, although he winces internally at her recklessness. 

Julian takes a quick look around to check if people are listening to them and notices a small family sitting at a nearby table. A couple in their 30s with a baby boy that Julian hears is called James. Julian can't help but think when all his younger siblings were that small, especially Tavvy, and he has to fight the urge to go play with little James. He's here to get a break from the kids, isn't he?

When Emma has finished her story and is concentrating on her phone (probably texting Cameron), Julian entertains himself by listening in on the couple with baby James. They are talking about hair dyes. Odd conversation.

_"Did you mean a 'demi' purple?"_ the woman asks, and Julian has no idea what that means. The man holds onto a black ring on a chain, tells the woman _'Maybe'_ and goes back to talking with his son before they all laugh as a family. Julian can't help but be a bit envious. Something like what that family has is what he's been dreaming of for ages. He swallows the lump in his throat. He wishes his life could be so seemingly simple.

As the man keeps rambling about how good his wife(?) looks, Julian looks at the woman a bit more closely. She is cute, he supposes, but Julian doesn't feel any attraction towards her. He never does, not when it isn't Emma. 

"What a cute family! The Dad is hot," Emma interjects, obviously having noticed Julian's staring. Julian looks at her, startled, feeling like he was caught doing something wrong. Well, he was staring at strangers and slightly eavesdropping and maybe ignoring Emma, so she does have a point. 

"You think so?" 

"Yeah, a total DILF," Emma says, and sometimes Julian wishes Emma was less blunt about these things. 

"Don't even tell me," Julian tells her as he shakes his head, wanting the image out of his head. 

Emma just smirks before laughing but luckily their pancakes arrive just then. 

As they start to eat, Julian can hear the man tell the woman _'You're always the one for me'_. Julian looks up at Emma, who has some strawberry on her lip, and he really wants to kiss it off her lips. She's the one for him, too, he knows it in his bones. He wants to tell her that. 

"Me and the kids should probably go to England really soon. To visit great aunt Marjorie," Julian spits out instead. It's not like they haven't been semi planning it for a while, since they really should visit her while she's still alive, but the timing... The timing is for Julian. He needs to get away from Emma, he needs to stop these feelings. Maybe if he doesn't see her for 2 months, maybe he will finally fall for someone else if she isn't around. (Part of him knows he's deluding himself, but he has to hope he isn't, that it's possible for him to love someone who isn't Emma) 

"Oh. I guess that's a good idea."

"Yeah, the weather's probably better in the summer, and Cristina Rosales is coming here for her travel year. So, you don't have to be alone. You two can manage, right?" 

"Right." 

Julian decides to try to avoid analyzing her expression, her tone. He can't allow himself to read into things. 

They both concentrate on their pancakes again, and Julian happens to look at the family when the man is also looking at his direction. Well, that's embarrassing. Julian looks away, while a part of him is tempted to look up, one last wistful look at that image of a simple, happy family he'll never have for himself. But it's OK. Julian can control anything. He just needs some distance from Emma to make his control actually work. 

He and Emma leave before the family, who seem to be having seconds, and Julian glances at them one final time, thinking of useless what ifs. He shakes his head and follows Emma back to the car.


End file.
